First, I guess I should thank you for shopping here.  Although I don't understand what you could possibly be going to do with ninety percent of what you buy, or why you think that buying something for the sole reason that it's only a dollar, or two for three dollars, of five ninety nine will save you money, if there weren't so very many of you , they wouldn't have felt the need to hire me, and while I would have a summer, I would also have another fifteen hundred dollars in college loans.  So I guess it's for the best.   
     That said, I would like to remind you that those of us who work here are people just like those of you who come to spend money.   Please remember that we don't suddenly become less human when we put on our green smocks and little plastic name tags.  Please remember that we don't do this because we enjoy it - we need the money, whether it's for college, or an apartment, or food.  Please don't make it worse than it already is.
     Don't come up to the register at five after ten, when we close at ten, and ask me to verify the price on every single item you have.  The two or three that didn't have it marked are ok, but I assure you, we let you know when things are cheaper then the tag says.  My mom suggested that maybe you couldn't read, and I felt bad for a second.  Then I remembered that you paid by check, and had no trouble writing out the store name and measly forty dollars you owed us.
      Yes, measly forty dollars.  Don't bring a hundred dollars up to the register, and spend fifteen minutes after closing time deciding what you actually want to buy.  Don't think you have all the time in the world just because there's no one in line behind you.  Don't spend a full minute deliberating over every item, then handing them to me without saying anything, so every time I have to ask if you want it or not.  Don't ask me for a subtotal every five dollars.  Don't leave a pile of things you decided you didn't want after all behind me, so tall it reaches my shoulders, when the expected amount of returns fits under the counter for the entire night.  Don't pick things up if you're just going to complain that they're broken and you don't want them. Get here before closing time, and do your shopping in the aisles, not the check-out line.
     Don't waste so much of my time - I do have to go clean the candles section after this, you know, straitening the mess you've made of it - that by the time you leave, it's ten twenty-three, and the manager has to come escort you out the doors because we've locked them twenty minutes ago.  Don't make me have to be eternally grateful that that same manager says she'll take care of your cart of stuff you decided not to get after all, so I have a slim chance of finishing a rough job of my work on time.  Please, just don't.
      Please, just remember that I am not a robot, and even though they do pay me (slightly) for it, I don't really want to be here.  Please realize that it takes all my willpower to keep my happy-smiling-customer-service face when you do all this, and just skip it.  Just be considerate.  
            Just be considerate, and remember I'm a person too.
                                 Love,      
                                          Your Friendly Neighborhood Discount Store Worker